Good morning
Sep 20th, 2008 by justsimplyholly
I’ve sat here this morning reading my late night rantings from last night and I wanted to apologize. I need to be the bigger person in this situation and stop letting some of my family members get to me. Stuff like this has gone on for nearly 20 years now, and with the raw emotions that I’m going through over losing my nephew, I guess it only intensified these feelings.
Right, wrong or indifferent, this is my family. I may not like them, but right now is not the time for me to let these feelings get the best of me, nor is it the time for me to allow them this type of energy. That’s the worst thing about anger, it takes up simply too much energy that would be better spent elsewhere! Right now I need to focus that energy on getting through this loss, a loss that has cut so many people so deeply, a loss that many will never heal from!
I’m so thankful for my husband and children as well and my other family members who have never made me feel this way. I’m also thankful for those of you who read my blog(s) who have sent me messages of support and encouragement through out this whole situation. If it weren’t for you, I don’t think I’d be able to sit here this morning with a semi clear mind.
With all of the “bad” that happened yesterday, there were actually some VERY good things that happened as well. Around 6 PM I just happened to look up at the door that entered into the room where the visitation was being held and seen the person who helped me the most when I lost my father to cancer. She was my best friend all through out high school, and my very first room mate when I moved out of my mothers home after graduation. I had not seen her for at least 10 years, and we honestly haven’t been very close for almost 20 years. She was exactly the person I wanted and needed to see! I also seen a few other friends from High School as well as numerous people that were a huge part of my life when I was growing up. And although I wasn’t getting much support from my immediate family, every last one of these people, people whom I haven’t seen in as much as 25 years, they gave me the support I needed. It was as if time had stood still and we were as close as we’d been many years ago.
I need to wrap this up and get ready to say my final good bye to my nephew. But I just wanted to take a moment before I got busy to thank YOU!
3 Responses to “Good morning”
Hello Holly,
I want to extend my heartfelt sorrow for the loss of one so young. Try to think of the event as a blessing for your nephew, he will not have to endure the trials that this country is headed for in the next few years and he is more than likely in heaven.
I have always been one to celebrate a family member’s passing. While I will still feel the sorrow (this sorrow is because I will miss them in my day to day life) I also feel joy for them that they have been accepted into God’s Kingdom.
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As they say, you can’t choose your family, but you can choose your friends. I’m glad you find hte support you need.
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I’m so sorry for your loss - that is truly heartbreaking. And I’m very sorry that there is so much trouble in your family. That is awesome that your old friends were there and were so supportive!
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